Are You Covering?

October 31, 2009 in Sovereign Grace Ministries

From the website Provender

Signs you may be covering for a pastor who abuses the flock spiritually:

  1. You’ve noticed a pattern of people leaving the fellowship, but don’t ask your pastor about it and don’t delve into the reasons behind the exits.
     
  2. You’ve seen your pastor act in retribution for slights or criticism by removing people from ministries, publicly or privately shaming them or refusing to listen to them.
     
  3. You excuse your pastor’s wrong behavior: he’s young, he doesn’t understand the people who are unhappy, he has a little trouble relating to people, he’ll grow out of it, I’m probably not seeing the whole picture, God will show him his weaknesses and he’ll handle things better soon.
     
  4. You find yourself blaming victims. You justify harsh behavior by your pastor by focusing on the sins of those who are shamed or shunned or criticized or punished.
     
  5. You feel that to protect the name of Christ in your community you need to keep secret the alarming behavior by your pastor or leaders in the church.
     
  6. You feel it’s your duty to think the best of your pastor, no matter what charges are brought against him, but you don’t extend the same courtesy to those who feel they’ve been abused or harmed.
     
  7. You feel it’s okay for your pastor to build up your church by cutting down other churches with “inferior” doctrines or practices, but it’s not okay for anyone to question decisions by church leaders if it looks like criticism.
     
  8. You enjoy being flattered by your pastor and seek to please him often. You spend a lot of time in church flattering and being flattered.
     
  9. You fear being criticized by your pastor or having your special ministry taken away.
     
  10. You’ve seen your pastor flatter those he can use and then later turn on them.
     
  11. You would feel uncomfortable asking to see financial records of the church, and you just assume that they are being used in a godly manner.
     
  12. You feel constantly pressured to help more in church or to give more, or both.
     
  13. Going to church often seems like a burden, but you don’t want anyone to know you feel that way.
     
  14. You have criticized other churches or individuals with your pastor.
     
  15. You like the feeling of being in the “inner circle,” and you feel you have the pastor’s confidence.
     
  16. You feel superior to Christians who don’t witness as much as you, or who don’t practice their faith as well as you, or who don’t emphasize certain doctrines like you do.
     
  17. You feel that no one quite understands the scriptures, delivers sermons or reaches out to the weak and poor like your pastor does.
     
  18. You spend much time defending your pastor, either in your own mind or to others.
     
  19. You don’t like to admit it, but you often spend more time thinking (whether positively, negatively or both) about your pastor or leaders than you do about God.
     
  20. You are exhausted.

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Thoughts, people?

© 2009, Kris. All rights reserved.